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Where Are My Freakin’ Pants?!!!
I’ve stated my admiration for Scott Berkun’s creative work several times before on this blawg (here and here and here and more!). Since he will be hatching his latest book soon, it’s time for BD00 to schtump for Scott once again.
Although BD00 would have preferred Scott to name his book with the same title as this post, it’s more respectfully named “The Year Without Pants: WordPress.com and the Future of Work“. Cool cover, aye?
In TYWP, Scott will tell the tale of his temporary flight from total self-reliance back into the real world – working for one year as a project manager for WordPress.com’s creator Automattic Inc.
Like his previously penned, delightful, page-turners, I expect TYWP to be yet another delicious mix of insight, sage advice, comedy, and drama.
If you’re gonna go a year without pants, you might as well don some funky red skivvies, no?
Usain Taylor
Since I love zombie movies, I recently watched the 3D version of “World War Z“. Similar to the brilliantly made “28 days Later” and “28 Months later” movies, the zombie dudes in WWZ are fast movers – undead versions of Usain Bolt with the tackling expertise of Lawrence Taylor and the chomping skill of Dracula.
I think this new twist on the zombie genre makes these movies much more exciting and suspenseful. You never freakin’ know when Usain Taylor is gonna explode out of nowhere and take a Shylockian pound of flesh out of your gut/butt/face/neck/arm/leg.
George Romero, who directed the most famous and beloved zombie movie ever made, “The Night Of The Living Dead“, doesn’t like the cinematic transition from lumbering hunks to agile bullets:
If zombies are dead, how can they move fast? – George Romero
Geez George. If you’re gonna bring logic into play, then:
If zombies are dead, how can they move at all? – BZ00
Successfully Pulling Off A “Snowden”
BD00 just finished reading this FastCompany.com article: “How To Whistleblow Like Edward Snowden Without Blowing Your Career”.
After reading the lame suggestions on how to successfully pull off a “Snowden” without getting your head chopped off, BD00 laughed his arse off when he spied the last sentence in the treatise:
Courts rarely side with whistle-blowers, despite considerable legal changes to aid the ethical ones.
That one single sentence trumped all the other sage advice previously proffered forth. To generalize further and make the factful quote scarier, simply replace the word “Courts” with “Those in authority“. And yes, this most likely includes the chain of command at your org, starting with your boss and moving upward.
Unless you harbor the insane delusion of becoming the next Erin Brockovich, BD00 recommends a STFU policy for all you disloyal ingrates out there.
You are assuming that the recipient of your information knows how to handle it in a way that doesn’t burn you – rarely is that the case.
Kudos To mttd
An indication that you’re improving as a blogger is if someone posts a link to one of your blog posts on Reddit.com. Some kind soul that goes by the Reddit handle of “mttd” actually did that for BD00 (thanks!).
The graphic below shows the relative spike in traffic that resulted from “mttd” acting as my benefactor. He/she posted a link to my June 1st “Agile Overload” post. Of course, the “what have you done for me lately” effect soon prevailed and traffic returned to normal shortly thereafter.
It’s Hammer Time!
The title of this post should have been “It’s Hammurabi Time!”, but it’s not as catchy as “It’s Hammer Time!“.
King Hammurabi lived over 2000 years ago and he was perhaps the first staunch “eye for an eye” dude:
Too bad we don’t have a slightly less Draconian, modern day version of Hammurabi’s creed that applies to Wall St. bankers (who take bailout money), crooked politicians (who get re-elected), and self-serving executives (who get unconditional exit bonuses). Many of these dudes do massive harm to their constituents without having to account for their actions.
Actually, we do have laws that attempt to ensure justice is served, but we also have expensive lawyers who ensure that the rich and powerful can play the game without any skin in it.
How do I get to become a member of the “All Upside and No Downside” club?
Designed To Be Fooled
Bravery, courage, self-confrontation, acceptance-of-limitations? WTF! BD00 doesn’t possess any of those attributes. But when the ink dries on this blog post, he’ll go back to foolishly thinking he does (what about you?). Mr. Taleb is right – mother nature is a tricky be-otch.
Posing For The Camera
That tweet was triggered by this exchange within the confines of one of the C++ LinkedIn.com groups:
Now granted, BD00 may come across as being a poser to some/many, but he actually tries to fend off the strong, innate desire to impress others with his self-proclaimed “expertise“. Of course, as the content of this blog confirms, he often fails miserably. How about you? How often do you find yourself posing for the camera?
LOL-Worthy
There are some creatively funny, LOL-worthy, parody accounts worth following on Twitter . Here’s a list of those that I laughingly trail.
Got any other recommendations for BD00?
Peerless
Don’t ya just love those dorky propaganda pictures coming out of North Korea showing Kool Kim Jong-Un peering through a set of vintage 1970s binoculars?
Seriously, I was wondering WTF the dude was looking at on all those “Korean Illustrated” magazine covers, but then I had an epiphany: Kimbo Jongo Uno is an obsessed bird watcher. Buh buh buh bird bird bird. Bird is the word!
Note: Like everything else on this god-forsaken blawg, the above Kimbo Jongo Pizza-Uno collage is not original. I saw one just like it on HBO’s “Real Time With Bill Maher” a couple of weeks ago. Of course, I busted a gut when I saw it and half of the martini gulp I just took rose up and cleared my nasal passages. A pleasant unintended consequence of the experience was the discovery that the martini-through-the-shnozz technique works better than a Neti pot.
Note2: Just imagine what would happen if I lived in North Korea and Bimbo Django Unkool or his cronies discovered this post. D’oh!
Note3: Here’s what Kimono looks like when he puts his binocs down. If he looks into a mirror, some heads will definitely roll.
124 To 858
When a friend recently pointed me toward hupso.com, here’s what I discovered:
As you can see, the Hupso.com and the WordPress.com stats aren’t even in the same ballpark. Since I believe my wordpress stats are more accurate, the bulldozer.com “franchise” is potentially worth $431 per year; or $36 per month (LOL!).
Oh well, I guess I can’t quit my day job. But that’s OK. Despite the anti-corpo rants I hoist on this blawg, I like my day job and I like the people I work with and I like the people I work for.
In any situation one finds themself in, it could always be better or it could always be worse. But when one only thinks in terms of “it could always be better and can never be worse“, then there’s likely to be trouble on the horizon.
Why am I here?
WTF?
Meh!
D'oh!
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