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Borgbot
I’m not sure you should worry much about the effect your behavior has on the organization overall, because there’s lots of data that suggests the organization doesn’t care much about you. – Jeffrey Pfeffer
That quote by Stanford University’s Jeffrey Pfeffer can be found in The Purpose of Power. From one systems point of view, a corpricracy as a whole is an inflexible and conscienceless borgbot with a single purpose – to make as much money it can, in any way it can. If the borgbot needs to chop off its nose or sell its mother into slavery or bankrupt millions of people outside its walls to fulfill its mission, it will.
The fascinating thing about borgbot behavior is that it ingeniously guilts its members into compliance (“aren’t you a team player?“, “if you don’t do it, you’re selfish and you’ll hurt the company“, “how dare you question management decisions“, “you’re a disloyal ingrate for speaking out“, yada-yada-yada) and rationalizes any unethical behavior away without blinking an eye.
Like most of us, Pfeffer wishes large-scale organizations were paragons of meritocracy where competence and influence are always perfectly correlated, but he knows that’s not the case – Gary Hamel
Notice the usage of the term “large-scale organizations” in Mr. Hamel’s quote. It implies that there’s hope – in small scale organizations. It makes self-righteous BD00 wonder why borgbots are obsessed with growth. Oh, I almost forgot; to make as much money as they can in any way they can.
Unjustifiable Precision
In “Object-Oriented Analysis and Design with Applications“, Grady Booch bluntly states:
Unjustifiable precision—in requirements or plans—has proven to be a substantial yet subtle recurring obstacle to success. Most of the time, early precision is just plain dishonest and serves to provide a façade for more progress of more quality than actually exists. – Grady Booch
Pretty harsh, but wise, words, no? So, why do managers, directors, and executives repeatedly demand micro-granularized schedules and commitments from knowledge workers from day one throughout the life of a project?
- Because “that’s the way it has always been done“
- To maintain the illusion of control
- To flex their muscles and “hold people accountable” each time a micro-commitment is broken
Codan The Barbarian
In the Indigo release of Eclipse‘s C++ Development Tools (CDT) plugin, the Codan static code analyzer runs in real time as you type in your code. As shown below, you can customize the rule set that Codan enforces via the “Preferences/C++/Code Analysis” dialog window. (My fave is the “ambiguous problem” entry.)
The figure below shows a few examples of Codan in action. While typing in code, a gold (warning) or red (error) bug icon appears adjacent to the line number of the crappy code you write.
Some of Codan’s warnings and errors are also detected by good compilers, but it’s kind of neat that you can discover and correct your defects before running the compiler/linker. This feature is a boon for large programs that take a while to compile and link.
As a long time developer, I’m thrilled to death to have open source tools like Eclipse available to dolts like BD00. I remember the old days when there were not many commercial tools available, yet alone high caliber, open source tool suites like Eclipse.
Hindsight Bias
In Nancy Leveson‘s forthcoming book, “Engineering A Safer World“, she provides the following attributes of Hindsight Bias (a.k.a “hindsight is always 20-20“):
So THAT’s why Bulldozer00 is always 100% right!
I find that the text in the blue ellipse is very insightful. If one switches his/her analysis slant from “what they did wrong” to “why it made sense at the time“, one’s emotional reaction will soften toward “those who are responsible for the mess“.
BD00’s attitude toward FUBAR situations, which used to be anger and frustration, has changed to wonder and curiosity. At some serendipitous point along the line, BD00 finally came to the realization that since borgs exhibit emergent behavior that can’t be traced back to a single source, tis better to laugh than cry.
Organizations often behave worse than any member would – Fred Brooks
The Null Set
Few would argue that Martin Luther King and Albert Einstein didn’t change the world for the betterment of the human race. These two stunningly similar quotes unveil one of the keys to their hard won success:
Many people fear nothing more terribly than to take a position which stands out sharply and clearly from prevailing opinion. – Martin Luther King
Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions. – Albert Einstein
Something tells me that this is an ironic twist on the cliche that “great minds think alike“. Great minds think alike, but so do mediocre minds. It’s just that on matters of importance, great minds don’t think like mediocre minds. D’oh!
Different Goals And Unfair Comparisons
At the behest of a work colleague, I revisited the Java programming language. I re-read James Gosling‘s 1995 white paper that introduced the language and I perused several Java-related wikipedia articles. Using those sources and Bjarne Stroustrup‘s “Evolving a language in and for the real world: C++ 1991-2006” paper, I developed the following side by side “design goals” lists:
In spite of these radically different design goals, people (including myself) continue to insist on comparing the languages in passionately irrational ways. If both language designs were driven by a common set of goals, then objectively valid comparisons could be made.
Java was intentionally designed from a blank sheet; unfettered from the ground up. Au contraire, C++ was intentionally designed by extending C and attempting to fix it’s short comings without breaking millions of lines of deployed code. It’s like comparing apples to oranges, dontcha think?
Executive Proposal
The lowly esteemed and dishonorable BD00 proposes to executives everywhere:
Whenever you change your org, supply the minions with TWO complementary org charts: the usual (yawn) who-reports-to-whom chart and a system operational structure chart.
Creating the first one is an easy task; the second one, not-so. That’s why you’ve never seen one.
The funny thing is, every borg has a “System Operational Structure” chart regardless of whether it’s known or (most likely) not. Reshuffling the “Who-Reports-To-Whom” chart without knowing and consulting with the “Systems Operational Structure” chart doesn’t improve operations (unless the reshuffler gets lucky), it justs changes who to blame when sub par performance persists after the latest and greatest reshuffle.
Wear It In Shame
Boy, does BD00 have a treat for you. Here’s the dealio.
Post a comment here with your assessment of this blog. Good or bad? What is BD00 doing right? What is BD00 doing wrong? Does BD00 piss you off? Does BD00 make you laugh? A bit of both? How could BD00 improve the content? What else would you like to say to BD00?
The writers of the first 2 “substantive” comments that BD00 receives will get a gratis copy of the notoriously famous “Cog Diss” T-shirt to wear in shame:
Notes:
- BD00 reserves the right to decide what “substantive” means.
- Sorry, but the only size BD00 has in stock is XL
- Hey Phil, did you notice that BD00 used your clipart in the design?
- Don’t feel that you have to give a rave review and kiss ass. If you feel the need to “substantively” rip BD00 a new one, then by all means do it.
- You can buy this shirt yourself (without the self-promotional back design) at cafepress.com/thefrontalassaultidiot.
Goo Goo Gah
Well, it’s here. Today Bulldozer00 turns fitty tree. I’ve experienced the privilege of having walked the earth and imbibing its wonders for 19,345 days. Although the imposter within causes “me” to lose the feeling for long stretches at a time, I’m incredibly grateful for being alive and having been born in the USA. It’s just a random stroke of luck that I wasn’t born a starving baby in Africa or said equivalent in a Brazilian favela.
One of my mottos is:
The purpose of life is to fight maturity – Dick Werthimer
If you ask many of the people I know, I think they would agree that I live by that credo. I don’t mind anymore, because the so-called mature adult crowd isn’t doing such a good job of running the world’s institutions and making the world a better place, no?
Bastions Of Objectivity
Experts don’t think, they know. (just like Bulldozer00)
In theory, high brow academic disciplines are supposed to be bastions of dispassionate objectivity. However, in the Oscar-winning documentary “Inside Job“, several of the most highly esteemed professors of economics are laughingly called out onto the mat by Charles Ferguson (ala Mike Wallace style) for taking payments from the financial institutions that triggered the 2008 meltdown. These dudes wrote papers and gave speeches praising the virtues of “no regulation” on junk bundles of sub-prime loans, credit default swaps and all other kinds of financial “innovations“. That in itself wouldn’t be so bad, but when these bozos shoveled their BS “expertise” onto laymen like you and me, they didn’t even disclose that they were being paid by the big bad dudes who figuratively deflated your pension and 401-K account.
Along with Kevin Smith’s “Red State“, former software-weenie Charles Ferguson’s “Inside Job” are the best two movies I’ve seen this year. If you’ve still retained your Netflix subscription after their recent price change fiasco, put these movies at the top of your queue.
Why am I here?
WTF?
Meh!
D'oh!
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